Sincerely Yours, Chloe
by ReadWriteFangirl
Summary: SongFic on the song Steven by Jake Miller. Chloe is troubled and has no where to turn, finding Beca within the last few hours. Five years later, it's Beca's turn to thank Chloe. TRIGGER WARNINGS: Substance Abuse, mentions of self harm and suicide


**A/N: This is a songfic about the amazing song 'Steven' By Jake Miller. He actually rapped about something that's a real issue, but I warn you, the song made me cry. And I have replaced the name Steven with Chloe and he with she. That is all.**

**And this is really triggering, so if you don't want to see any triggers or insults that could offend you, I recommend you stop reading now. **

* * *

_Chloe walked through the school, her hoodie pulled far down over her arms, covering the fresh and old scars that lay upon her skin. Her fingers moved her hair in front of her blackened eye, which was the after effect of her step-dad hitting her, again. She avoided the eyes that were cast her way. She looked at her 'friends' Aubrey, Jessica and Stacie, who just turned away from her._

_She walked into her first class, sitting in the back corner, where she always sat, not drawing attention to herself. She looked at the jocks and cheerleaders including the people she used to share everything with. If only she had the courage to go to them and show them what they made her do, but it would make things worse, not better. She slumped in her chair, not paying attention to what was happening in the class. _

* * *

Beca re-read her letter. The only one that said thank-you. The cursive hand writing was rushed, and the ink was smudged due to tear stains. That was 5 years ago, and looking across the bridge, she sighed. It had taken so many lives, some young, some old. Some people survived, but she wasn't one.

_I'm going to miss you._

Her anger was high, every month she'd walk to this bridge and imagine it happening. The locks disappearing into the water, never to re-emerge with life within the body they belonged to.

_You're the one person who understood. Why didn't I find you sooner?_

Beca took a deep breath, before sliding her headphones onto her ears. She was owed something, something meaningful. Not the tears that were shed.

* * *

_Chloe hurried to the front of the school, before someone noticed her and beat her up again. She walked out and into the rain. People were running to their parents' cars, others were sitting in their own cars, laughing and listening to music. Chloe sighed and walked into the onslaught, the walk was three miles long, and her bag was hardly waterproof, she could just imagine her work and notes getting soaked, which would turn her teacher's anger towards her, as if she didn't have enough on her plate already. _

_The rain poured down and she felt her hoodie get suck to her arms. She slipped around the corner into an alleyway, not too far from where she lived. _

_"Look who it is." Bumper Allen walked up to her and pushed her against the wall. "What happened to your arms? You attention seeking slut."_

_Chloe tried to pull her hoodie sleeves down, but Jesse Swanson held her arms above her head. "Aw, does little Chlo' Bird want to go to mommy?" He slapped her, and dropped her to the ground. _

_Donald picked her bag up and sorted through it, taking a packet of painkillers. "Look at this, someone's an addict." _

_Chloe glanced to the opposite wall, to Aubrey, Stacie and Jessica. "Hel-." _

_Bumper's fist connected with her chin. Making her fall back to the floor, blood running down her chin. "Don't talk to them. They don't want to talk to you." _

* * *

Beca slipped the letter into her pocket, before turning her back to the bridge and walking in the direction of her apartment. They hadn't got what they had deserved, it was their fault she did what she did, as well as issues from her family. If she could turn time back, Beca would do it. She'd help her through it, make her realise that it wasn't the end. That she could have been helped.

Beca walked into the apartment and hung her jacket up, taking the letter out of the pocket and walking into her kitchen.

* * *

_"Leave her alone." Beca ran down the alleyway and kicked Bumper in the balls. _

_He doubled over in pain. "Jesse, Donald, get her." _

_Beca froze when Jesse and Donald walked up to her. She looked at Chloe, who she'd seen around school. Jesse threw the first pu__nch. Due to his height, Beca was able to duck the punch, throwing one into his gut. While Donald was overcome with shock that the smallest girl in school had just hit one of the biggest boys, Beca ran around him, grabbing Chloe's bag and slinging it over her shoulder. She took both of Chloe's hands and pulled her to her feet._

_"My house is close, we can go there." She wiped Chloe's mouth and positioned her so she was taking most of the red-head's weight. Chloe nodded and started walking out of the alleyway, Beca glanced behind them, seeing Jesse and Donald help Bumper up from the floor. She smirked, before directing Chloe to her house._

_"I need to go to my house." Chloe supported her own weight again. "Thank you?..."_

_"Beca." _

_"Thank you Beca, I'll write you a letter." Chloe took her bag and walked to where her family lived. As soon as she arrived, she realised her mom's car was gone, like every other point in the year when she just disappeared. Chloe walked inside and walked up to her room. She laid her notes out on the floor, leaving them to dry out as best they would. _

_She took a bottle of vodka out of her wardrobe and took the top off. She took a gulp and threw three packets of painkillers on her bed, she had stolen them from her mom, and she hadn't noticed. Chloe took them two at a time, until all 36 were gone, she closed her eyes and imagined the crash. The car crash that had killed her father. _

_He was her light at the end of the tunnel. But since he was gone, that tunnel had been filled in. She had no idea what to do, and with her older brother always in and out of jail and doing drugs, her mom disappearing and her step-dad and schoolmates' constant beatings, everything was fading. Tears ran from her eyes, her dad would know what she should do, he would help her. _

* * *

Beca took a pen and paper from the island and put them beside the letter. Every single thing that had happened was in that letter, the thanks, the tales, what she had done. Beca tapped her hands on the island in a rhythm.

"Let me tell you 'bout a kid called Chloe."

The lyrics flowed onto the paper, and Beca could picture a 16 year-old Chloe sitting in the toilets at lunch, thanking her for helping her with the assholes that had beat her up the day they met. In such a short time, she'd become attached to Chloe, and when she didn't see her, she was confused. She was the only person who noticed, that was until the news report. About a girl jumping off a bridge.

* * *

_Chloe sat on her knees, her hands together and her looking up to the ceiling. She didn't often talk to god, but right now she needed him, more than she ever had._

_"God I know we haven't talked in a long time, but this time I really need you. Please God help me, say something just give me a sign, because now I'm falling apart and I don't think that I can do it. Please God, give me the strength to pull through it. Tell me, Should I give up? I could end it all right now, there's the Golden Gate Bridge. I just don't know if I'm brave enough to do it. There's got to be a better way than suicide, right? Try to wait it out, give it time, I'll be fine. __But it's been so long and I still haven't been able to get rid __of all the thoughts that I feel inside. I'm so sick, so angry, so mad __and to top it off no one even knows that." _

_She wiped the tears from her eyes and stood up, walking over to the desk. She took a notepad and pen. Her hand was shaky, but she could still write. She wrote 5 letters to people who had participated in her decision. Her mom, her step-dad, her brother, The bullies: Jesse, Bumper and Donald, and finally, her so-called friends: Aubrey, Jessica and Stacie. _

**_I hope that you all feel guilty. Because I'm broken now and you can't heal me. And now you're all an accomplice in murder each and every one of you has chipped in to kill me. So the reason that I'm writing to you this evening, is to say goodbye and to tell you that I'm leaving. But don't hold your breath because I won't ever be coming back.  
Sincerely yours, Chloe_**

_ Then, she wrote a thank you note. To Beca, the one person who had been there in her time of need. Albeit for a short time, but she still helped when no one else would even look at her. _

**_Thank you. This isn't your fault at all. You were the one person who understood. Why didn't I find you sooner? But this is goodbye. Tonight I'm jumping the Golden Gate Bridge, but by the time you get this, I'll be dead. So just go on without me.  
I will miss you.  
From, Chloe_**

_She wiped the tears from her eyes and walked downstairs, slipping the letters into her schoolbag. She walked out of the house for one final time before running as fast as she could to the bridge. She ignored the angry horns from cars as she climbed onto the railing. She held her arms out and imitated the famous Titanic scene. But she didn't have a Leonardo DiCaprio nearby. Chloe took a deep breath and leaned forwards. She felt the wind in her hair, and for the first time since her father's death, she felt alive. _

* * *

Beca handed Cynthia Rose the paper. She had traveled to her best friend's recording studio on the other side of the city.

"Is this for her?" The black woman read the lyrics, "they're powerful Becs."

Beca nodded, "I know, but she didn't get a good send off, I was the last person she knew to see her alive. They all cried, but they didn't mean it. I want the world to know her story, Chloe's story."

Cynthia Rose smiled and opened the door to the studio, Beca walked into the booth and put the headphones on her ears. "This is for you Chloe." She whispered before Cynthia gave her the go-ahead.

"Yeah, look  
Let me tell you about a kid named Chloe  
She's slowly running out of things to believe in  
Every couple of months her mom leaves her,  
for no good reason her step-dad beats her

Not too many friends, only ever had a few of them,  
but recently they don't want anything to do with her  
Always eating lunch in the bathroom stall,  
She just wants to feel normal and be cool again, yeah  
Always feeling like the outcast, she's been going crazy ever since her dad passed  
She needs guidance and advice but instead  
She only has breakdowns and flashbacks of the car crash uh  
It's been getting harder everyday, if he was still around everything would be ok  
Cuz her dad was always the light at the end of the tunnel,  
but now that same damn tunnel is looking dark and grey  
She keeps quiet in the back of the class  
and when the bell rings Chloe hurries home fast  
scared to death the other kids will kick her ass on the long walk home  
cuz its happened in the past so

She's getting used to the black eyes and fat lips  
but all she's got is a fake smile and cut wrists  
Wishin' she could walk right up to them and show them the scars  
and say look you're the reason that I've done this  
Maybe they would finally understand and go back to how it was before it all began  
But she's just a little different so they taunt him and they beat him  
Yeah it's all just fun and games, they don't give a damn, yeah  
Her older brother ain't around, in and out of jail, hanging with the wrong crowd  
He's been doing coke, smoking weed, getting drunk all his life he's a shame  
no, he's not too proud

Now his habits are rubbing off on his little sis yeah, but guess what?  
Little did he know that everytime he did a line,  
everytime he lit a joint,  
everytime he took a shot he was settin mode  
So Chloe's sitting in her room getting high now  
Doors locked, music up, with the lights out  
She just takes another toke til her room fills with smoke  
5-6-7 hours til she knocks out  
Now she started stealing pills from her mom  
8-9-10 at a time and now they're gone  
and maybe for a moment all her problems seem to fade,  
but the high fades too after not too long  
and that's when it really sinks in and that's when it hits her  
that these god damn drugs won't fix her

Curled up on the floor, can't take it anymore  
Now she's talking to God cuz he's the only one that gets her  
On her knees, looking up, can't stop crying  
"God I know we haven't talked in a long time  
but this time I really need you. Please God help me, say something  
just give me a sign, because now I'm falling apart and  
I don't think that I can do it. Please God, give me the strength  
to pull through it. Tell me, Should I give up? I could end it all right now.  
I just don't know if I'm brave enough to do it.  
Cuz there's gotta be a better way than suicide.  
Try to wait it out, give it time, you'll be fine.  
But it's been so long and I still haven't been able to get rid  
of all the thoughts that I feel inside. So sick, so angry, so mad  
and to top it off no one even knows that"  
That's when she stood up, wiped her tears, walked over to her desk  
and got a pen and a notepad  
She just couldn't see it getting any better

So on a cold dark night in December, Chloe knew exactly what she had to do  
But first she sat down and wrote a couple letters  
One to her step-dad, one to her mother,  
couple to the kids at school, one to her brother  
Bringing them the pain that they once brought her  
tear drops on the paper one after another  
'Yeah, I hope that you all feel guilty.  
Cuz I'm broken now and you can't heal me  
And now you're all an accompliss in murder  
each and every one of you has chipped in to kill me  
So the reason that I'm writing you this evening,  
is to say goodbye and to tell you that I'm leaving  
But don't hold your breath cuz I ain't never coming back  
Sincerely yours, Chloe.'"

Cynthia Rose looked at Beca, "but you left out you."

Beca nodded, "it hits them more without me in it."

* * *

**How was that? Was it terrible?... Review and tell me what you think!**


End file.
